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    Rules of Competitive Battling

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    Zenith
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    Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Zenith on Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:27 pm

    It\'s like the Rules of Internet, minus the /b/!

    1. Your team has a Metang weakness. No exceptions.
    2. Play to win or STFU.
    3. Everything can learn weird moves.
    4. Everything is scarfed. No exceptions.
    5. Think about Bissey.
    6. Seaking. No further explanation required.
    7. Farfetch'd is not good. Stop trying.
    8. Hax!
    9. Everyone has a Garchomp. No exceptions.
    10. Emo X always loses. No excpetions.
    11. Wobbufett vs Wobbufett is the best battle ever. No exceptions.
    12. Sableye is not used except with Wonder Guard.
    13. Dunsparce is the best Pokemon. Live with it, or he\'ll kill you.
    14. Cute pokemon are weak. No exceptions.
    15. Emo X is always wrong. No exceptions.
    16. Kaiser is a whiny bitch. No exceptions.
    17. There\'s always a bigger fish, and it\'s name is Seaking.
    18. If you can\'t understand what your Pokemon is saying when it says \'Pika-pika!\' you are a horrible, heartless trainer.
    19. Jewz break Wi-Fi.
    20. Male Gardevoir must ALWAYS have \"Show Cock\" as their main attack. It\'s 4x against all types. Seaking is the exception.
    21. Lucario is ALWAYS gay.
    22. Every time you slaughter a cute Pokmon, a Goldeen becomes a Seaking.
    23. The connection is NEVER \"lost\"
    24. No one expects the CB Jirachi Inquisition. No exceptions.
    25. Garchomp always wins. No exceptions.
    26. You DO liek mudkip. No exceptions.
    27. Splash owns you. Deal with it.
    28. Pakry sucks at making rules.
    29. Garchomp always has Flamethrower, Dragon Claw, Earthquake, Outrage, Fire Blast, Dragon Rush, Draco Meteor, Crunch, Stone Edge, Swords Dance, Surf, Fire Fang, and Substitute. No exceptions.
    30. Hidden Power is ALWAYS haxed
    31. Whenever you suggest a counter to something, remember that there are always three layers of spikes, two layers of toxic spikes, and stealth rock up plus a sandstorm is brewing. No exceptions.
    32. [Your Pokemon]'s attack missed! No exceptions.
    33. [Your Pokemon] fainted! No exceptions.
    34. But it failed. No exceptions.
    35. In tall grass, a wild Seaking will ALWAYS appear. Because Seaking is coming for you.
    36. False Swipe is the only 100% accurate OHKO move.
    37. Spinda. Do I need to explain more?
    38. A Luvdisc Tackle is the ultimate counter to every Ghost pokymanz.
    39. Mudkipz: it's what's for dinner, tonight.
    40. All Pokemon that learn Explosion should have Explosion. No exceptions.
    41. OHNOEZ! It's Wobbufett.
    42. SkarmBliss, your mother, and a rabbi. The ultimate team.
    43. Their Arceus was haxed. No exceptions.
    44. Bluescreens cause T I M E P A R A D O X.
    45. No Ubers, no hax, no voice chat, no OUs, no BLs, no UUs, no NUs, no DS. Final Destination.
    46. Mudkip wins; Flawless Victory.
    47. Everyone's gay for Bridget Lucario.
    48. Venusaur will ALWAYS be taking in sunlight. No exceptions.
    49. If it exists, Seaking has yet to deal with it. Fuck yeah.
    50. Pinsir will NEVER step out of Heracross's shadow.
    51. It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the Hydro Pump again.
    52. Minun without Plusle will ALWAYS get raped up the ass, and vice versa.
    53. If your team exists, then it is vulnerable to Trick Room. No Exceptions.
    54. If you are using Baton Pass, you WILL get P-hazed/Hazed.
    55. EXTREAMSPEED. NO EXCEPTIONS.
    56. Weather teams ALWAYS phail to Obamasnow/Tyrant-tar.
    57. In double battles, your opponent WILL have a Darkrai-Kyogre combo.
    58.Clefable will ALWAYS have Magic Guard. No Exceptions.
    59. Smeargle WILL find some way to explode on you. No Exceptions.
    60. Metronome is NEVER in your favor. No exceptions.
    61. There will ALWAYS be dirty nicknames. ALWAYS.
    62. If no ubers exist, then let them eat Garchomp.
    63. If it's at level 100, Rare Candies WERE used to get it there. No Exceptions.
    64. Effectiveness=(metronome)x(choice item)^2
    65. Wrap, Bind and Constrict are ALWAYS innuendos. No Exceptions.
    66. Everstone works on all pokemon. The exception is Seaking.
    67. If you have a Focus Sash, your opponent WILL use Stealth Rock. No exceptions.
    68. Marowak:Thick Club::Clefable:Magic Guard. No Exceptions.
    69. OHKO moves WILL phail on Bidoof, and Bidoof only. Everything else is fair game.
    70. Give me Blissey or give me death. No exceptions.
    71. Earthquake. No Exceptions.
    72. There will NEVER be a mono-flying type. No Exceptions, as Arceus is ALWAYS haxed.
    73. Tinted Lens WILL rape you.
    74. You just looked up what Tinted Lens does. No Exceptions.
    75. CM'Cune will always be owned by Hax. No Exceptions.
    76. f you set up, you will die. No Exceptions.
    77. Electrode WILL Taunt you. No Exceptions.
    78. Electrode WILL Explode. No Exceptions.
    79. Bronzong will ALWAYS be ruined by Taunt. No Exceptions.
    80. Whitney's Miltank WILL fuck you up.
    81. Clair was hot, no exceptions.
    82. Gold. Silver. Crystal. Enough said.
    83. Buying Slowpoke Tails makes you a terrible person.
    84. lolkurt
    85. Jasmine will not bitch about you beating her.
    86. Nazil has 3-4kg of acid in his system


    Last edited by Lord Ryu on Sat Sep 20, 2008 5:44 pm; edited 11 times in total


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    [19:25:59] Prostiboots : Especiallyabout soething like every pokaymanzo n her tea counters.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Prostiboots on Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:31 pm

    YAY

    This is fun.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:37 pm

    I did the emox one.

    Dunspare is the best pokemon. Live with it, or he'll kill you.

    Cute pokemon are weak. No exceptions.

    Machamp is always named Jebus. No exceptions.

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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Guest on Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:00 pm

    ok ppl!
    10. Emo X always loses. No excpetions.
    i dont always lose!
    sometimes i win agaisnt ma friends and they have really good teams.
    and those rules are n00bish phailure except for the wonder guard sableye won that rox!
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:20 pm

    Yes. Add one saying emo x is always wrong as well.

    You winning vs. people who don't know what evs are doesn't count fool.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Shadows on Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:36 pm

    There's always a bigger fish, and it's name is Seaking.

    If you can't understand what your pokemon is saying when it says 'Pika-pika!' you are a horrible, heartless trainer.

    Jewz break wi-fi.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Prostiboots on Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:01 pm

    Male Gardevoir must ALWAYS have "Show Cock" as their main attack. It's 4x against all types. Seaking is the exception.

    Lucario is ALWAYS gay.

    Every time you slaughter a cute PokMon, a Goldeen becomes a Seaking.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Guest on Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:19 pm

    The connection is NEVER "lost"
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Sasami on Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:46 pm

    No one expects the CB Jirachi Inquisition!

    and

    Garchomp always wins. No exceptions.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Duncan on Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:43 pm

    You DO liek mudkip. No exceptions.

    Splash owns you. Deal with it.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Sagehawk on Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:47 pm

    Sagehawk always wins.

    Suen always wins.

    Sage always wins.

    .... wtf OMG YOU ARE ALL BREAKING THE 3 MOST IMPORTANT RULES! IM SUPPOSED TO WIN NOT YOU!



    *GROWL*


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Zenith on Fri Aug 01, 2008 11:46 pm

    Added the worthy ones. Someone pin this.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:11 am

    Meh, I liked my jebus one.

    There is no such thing as a big bones snorlax. Like you, they are always fat. Always.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Zenith on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:11 am

    Pakry you suck at these.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:13 am

    Meh, i do not.

    I suck at making pokemon ones.

    At ones that have to do with being mean, i'm rather good at.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Zenith on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:16 am

    Added rules 28 and 29.


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    [19:25:59] Prostiboots : Especiallyabout soething like every pokaymanzo n her tea counters.

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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Guest on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:22 am

    Hidden Power is ALWAYS haxed
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:30 am

    Machamp ALWAYS has all OHKO moves. No ex.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Sasami on Sat Aug 02, 2008 4:05 am

    Whenever you suggest a counter to something, remember that there are always three layers of spikes, two layers of toxic spikes, and stealth rock up plus a sandstorm is brewing. No exceptions.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Shadows on Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:30 am

    [Your Pokemon]'s attack missed! No exceptions.

    [Your Pokemon] fainted! No exceptions.

    But it failed. No exceptions.

    In tall grass, a wild Seaking will ALWAYS appear. Because Seaking is coming for you.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Prostiboots on Sat Aug 02, 2008 10:59 am

    False Swipe is the only 100% accurate OHKO move.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Sat Aug 02, 2008 11:03 am

    Any pokemon with a 31 in any stat is HAX. No Excepshans.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Prostiboots on Sat Aug 02, 2008 11:13 am

    Spinda. Do I need to explain more?

    A Luvdisc Tackle is the ultimate counter to every Ghost pokymanz.

    Mudkipz: it's what's for dinner, tonight.


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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Tobi on Sat Aug 02, 2008 11:22 am

    Squirtle makes the best soup.
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    Re: Rules of Competitive Battling

    Post by Duncan on Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:11 pm

    If you use the mic., you are gay. No exceptions.

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